My name is Ina Akari.
I’m a second-year high schooler, currently staying with my twin sister at the home of a certain man. This is the story of how, ten years ago, when I was in first grade…
…I fell in love with a man. ”……” It was winter, ten years prior.
I was sitting alone under the cold sky.
This was the rooftop of the building that housed the cram school we attended.
The roof of the mixed-use commercial building where the school was located.
I was curled up in a ball, crying. “Hik… uhh…” Why was I crying?
It’s because… I got bullied at school that day. —Yo, foreigner~. —Blonde hair, blonde hair~.
—Dyeing your hair gold is something only delinquents do!
The guys in my class had been mocking the color of my hair.
I have golden hair and blue eyes.
This isn’t because I dyed it or anything like that.
We twins… exist in a particularly abnormal family environment. This hair? It’s the fault of our parents’ blood. We were born this way.
“Ugh… grr… uuuuugh…!”
The reason I was sad wasn’t just because my appearance got mocked, of course…
It was the fate of being born to parents like this that made me feel unbearably sorry for myself.
Both my sister and I… hate our house.
We have no place there, and on top of that, if we go to school, we get ridiculed as 【foreigners】 or 【delinquents】.
…In Japan, this look with foreign blood mixed in stands out significantly.
And more often than not, we’re loathed for it.
—Dyeing their hair at such a young age like that?
—What kind of parents are they? —Those poor children.
If my parents had been gentle people, I could have endured it. But they weren’t.
The only reason I was able to keep pushing through… was because I had my sister.
It’s because my older sister was there. Someone with the same blood in her veins. She was kind to me…… so I somehow managed to keep going. ……But.
Every time people made fun of my hair color, every time adults looked at me with disdain. ……Why does it always have to be me? I thought that a lot.
My sister’s hair is a beautiful, deep black.
Even if I know it’s unfair to hold grudges against her, even though I love her so much…… those dark feelings won’t disappear. 『…………I’m done with this.』
Today, my sister caught a cold and is sleeping at home.
I wanted to stay by her side. I wanted to nurse her back to health.
……But [that person] came and beat me up, saying I was wasting the tuition money, so this is where I ended up. 『…………Let’s just end it all.』
My hair color. The blood running through my veins. My family.
Things I can’t change, no matter what I do…… Fate.
So, if I was born into this kind of fate, if I’ve hit rock bottom in this life…… there’s nothing left but death……. 『…………』 I grabbed the railing on the rooftop.
Beyond this…… freedom is waiting for me.
I gripped the railing tightly, pulling myself up with the same motion as climbing a pull-up bar, and— 『What the hell are you doing?』
Hee-hee, with a light toss, I was lifted from behind. When I turned around, there was… ”…Ookayama, sensei.”
That person was the older guy who worked part-time at the cram school Atashi and my big sister attended. Okani Mitsuhiko.
If I remembered correctly, he said he was a first-year university student (19 years old).
“That’s dangerous, trying to jump over things like that here.” The older guy scolded me gently. Atashi was… surprised.
Grown-ups always harbored negative feelings toward me.
My parents threw their fists. The other grown-ups hurled dirty words at me.
But this older guy was different.
Purely, he was worried about Atashi and showed his care. “What about your apology?” ”…I’m sorry.”
The older guy smiled while holding me in his arms. “It’s okay as long as you know that.”
When I was lifted up so lightly, my heart was racing.
Atashi and my big sister knew all too well how strong grown-ups are.
The pain from being hit showed us that grown-ups were powerful beings.
I had been taught, in the deepest part of my body, that he was a terrifying existence I could never defy.
But… Oka-chan was different. Aniki was different.
The first time that person picked me up, the way my body floated light as air… I’ll never forget it.
Warm and strong… but gentle. “Setting you down.” ”…Hn”
I just wanted Oka-chan to hold me like that. Forever. I didn’t want to be put down.
I wanted him to keep holding me… like this.
“You’re getting heavy, so I’m putting you down.” “Ah…”
The moment my feet touched the ground, it felt like I was being yanked back into reality.
But… even then, there was no unpleasant feeling about living in reality anymore than before. My heart was racing… pounding.
At that time, I didn’t know what that emotion really was.
”…Hey, why? Did you come looking for me?” The question slipped from my lips.
He was a stranger. He had no obligation to stop my suicide.
Okarin let out a sigh and said.
“Class has already started, and the students aren’t showing up. It’s only natural that I’d come looking.” “I see… I’m sorry.”
Ruffling his hair roughly, Okarin muttered, “Just hold on a sec,” and left the scene.
Before long, Okarin returned to me, carrying two cans.
“Cocoa or corn chowder? Which one do you want?” “Eh…?”
“I’ll let you pick whichever you prefer. So, which is it?”
Okarin crouched down beside me and held out the can in his hand. “W-why…?”
Why was he doing something like this? What about the class?
When I asked that, Okarin replied, “We’re on a sudden holiday today.” That couldn’t be right.
Since the tuition had been paid in full, Okarin was obligated to teach his students.
If he slacked off like this, he would definitely get scolded by the cram school staff.
In fact… I had seen him being scolded before. ”…Why?”
“It’s because you’re crying.” I realized I was crying. Not from pain, but… from happiness. I understood then.
This person was seeing me with sad eyes and comforting me.
For the first time… I had met a kind adult.
One who didn’t beat me, didn’t look at me with prejudice…
Who looked straight at me.
He noticed that I was crying because something sad had happened. “Don’t cry.” “Mmm…”
Ocarin said nothing else; he just pulled me into his arms and stroked my head.
“I don’t know what happened… but, come on, have a drink. It’ll warm you up.” “Hnnn…”
My face was a mess of tears and snot, so I couldn’t tell the taste, but…
Still, the warmth of the [thing] he offered soaked into my heart.
“That is… um… Teacher…” I hesitated.
Because this was the first time I had ever confided my troubles to someone.
I couldn’t bring myself to confess the troubles buried deep in my heart—not to my family, not to any of the adults, and not even to my older sister.
But with this guy… I thought he might actually be willing to listen.
“I hate… this world…”
I figured he’d just laugh it off as something a precocious brat would say.
But Okarin didn’t do that.
“I get it. I hate this world too.” What he offered was empathy.
For the first time, we connected. It made me happy that someone understood the pain inside me. “You do?”
“Yeah. The world is unjust.” “Rifu-jin?”
“It just doesn’t go your way… it’s out of our control.” Okarin raised his hand.
As if trying to grasp something in the air, he continued.
“See, I’ve got a dream I’m chasing. But that dream is so far away… and today, my friend went ahead and easily realized it before me…”
I had no idea what Okarin was pointing at or what he was even talking about.
“Here I am, desperate, flailing and clawing, reaching out with all my might… yet the dream remains utterly out of reach. And other people? They snatch it up with such ease. It’s really not fair…”
I clearly remember him wearing a sad face.
“The world is brutal to adults. You can want to become the person you aspire to be all you want, but it won’t let you have it easily.”
…The Okarin of that moment was incredibly cool.
His words had a flair to them, poetic in nature.
I was completely smitten with Okarin by then. “But you’re different.”
Bon, he gave my head a light pat.
“You’re still seven… just a kid. You can become anything. It might not be visible, but hope—there’s something like that. If you look hard enough, it’s right there. So…”
I looked him dead in the eyes as he tried to comfort me.
I wasn’t crying anymore. “I found hope.” “Huh?”
I shot up to my feet and gave Okarin on the cheek a kiss. “Okarin!”
“O-Okarin…? Me?”
I nodded with a smile and said this.
“I’ve come to love the world! Because… because I found Okarin!” I spoke my dream boldly and proudly.
In this world, so riddled with injustice and filled with nothing but despair.
I had caught a glimpse of hope, of a future.
“My dream is to become Okarin’s wife! Absolutely, definitely, I’m getting married to Okarin!”
That day, I found a reason to live.
Okarin was my hope, my prince, the one I loved… So absolutely, I will not hand him over.
Even if the other party is a wealthy heiress, or a friend from college.
…Even if it’s a blood relative, I won’t yield.
I am the one who loves him the most in this entire world.
I will absolutely never… hand Okarin over to anyone.
With this body, with this beauty, I’ll make him my slave. Okarin, I’m serious now. So… you’d better brace yourself, okay?