The ogre race possesses one to three horns atop their heads and is characterized by its overall massive stature. While not as colossal as the giants said to dwell beyond the western seas, in the Northwestern Plains—including Trot Celesta—they are undoubtedly among the strongest races in terms of raw physical power.
Their innate bulk and strength guarantee combat prowess that renders half-hearted weaponry irrelevant. According to the official tactical metrics of the Celesta Army, if a fully armored standard human male or a lightly equipped dwarf soldier is rated as 1, then an unarmed ogre male equates to 2.5.
In other words, no matter how heavily armed a regular human soldier may be, it is tactically unsound for them to challenge a bare-knuckled ogre with fewer than two comrades. When properly equipped, however, these creatures instantly rise to a combat rating of 5—one individual matching the threat level of a single charging cavalryman. The ogres’ bold and flamboyant battlefield maneuvers make them the stars of any engagement.
Given this context, it is no exaggeration to say that an Ace Knight, required to hold his own against five regular ogre soldiers alone, is an exceedingly rare phenomenon.
Enough digression.
It is universally acknowledged—even by ogres themselves—that the ogres’ massive frames and occasionally monstrous appearances tend to appear grotesque in human eyes. That said, ogres do not consider humans beautiful either. In their view, human women are “too slender and weak to be reassuring,” and while “cute,” they fail to arouse passion; one can only feel a love akin to that for livestock.
Naturally, the ogre race possesses its own aesthetic standards—a balanced sexual sensibility. While ogre females are not as muscular as males, their tall stature is undeniable. As a racial trait, they possess particularly flexible genitalia and robust bodies capable of containing an ogre penis averaging nearly 50 centimeters in length (even requiring instinctive internal organ displacement).
Furthermore, ogre women are generally energetic; some regions even maintain matrilineal societies where polyandry persists. A tall, spirited woman who can embrace men embodies the ogre ideal of a “good woman”—the antithesis of the conventional lady admired in current human society.
Consequently, despite inter-racial marriage being legally recognized in Celesta, unions between ogres and humans rarely materialize. Even when living together, they are perceived not as partners but as something akin to completely distinct “alien species,” unlike the relationship between humans and elves.
Amidst this backdrop stands a young ogre who has cleared numerous hurdles to become a human lover. His name is Arnie Boyd. A rookie member of the Crossbow Squad within the Northern Celesta Army stationed near Basson, a trading city in northern Celesta, he holds the rank of Corporal.
This is the tale of such an improbable couple. Well, perhaps I’m overstating it. It’s not quite a miracle—but it is certainly remarkable.
◇◇◇
In Basson, shared horse-drawn carriages circulate through the town at a leisurely pace, frequently stopping to let passengers board or alight. Though affordable and accommodating with minor fare adjustments, these vehicles serve more as public works—a genteel stroll for retired riding horses—rather than true mounts.
Silvia MacLean boarded one such carriage, requesting that her driver take her to the grand arena on the opposite side of town. That day was scheduled for a magic show. Here, “magic” does not refer to sleight of hand but to genuine sorcery. Researchers from the Department of Magic Studies at the Capital University travel across all of Celesta once a year, performing visually delightful spells to generate research funds.
This annual magic show has become Silvia’s greatest joy of the year.
”……♪”
“My dear, you seem in high spirits,” remarked the elderly driver.
Silvia returned with a radiant smile.
“Yes! I look forward to the magic show every year.”
“Oh, is that so? Well, since I’m delivering you anyway, I might as well watch too.”
“You’d be missing out if you didn’t, old man!”
“Hah hah hah. Well, as long as there aren’t other passengers heading to the arena…”
Clap-clap, clop-clop-clop. The carriage drifted lazily toward the arena.
Meanwhile, Earnie was on duty for grocery shopping that day.
Kelly Isaac, the squad leader, and I had come to Basson together, pulling a handcart.
“Why do we have to be on duty for shopping?”
“If it were just humans doing it…”
The complaints about being assigned as shoppers are always the same. But there was a reason behind their grumbling this time.
Earnie (Plain Ogre, 277 cm tall) and Kelly (Cow Ogre, 310 cm tall) couldn’t fit into a carriage. Well, actually, troop transport carriages were designed to accommodate ogres, so they could ride inside—but there was no room for them on the driver’s seat.
That meant whenever it was their turn, they had to pull a handcart instead of riding in a carriage. Even though ogres pride themselves on their strength, having horses do such simple work while they haul things by hand was deeply frustrating for them.
“Besides, the general store in Basson has ceilings so low it’s unbearable.”
“At our height, we’re basically crawling on all fours anyway.”
“You know, before you even entered that place, I got pointed at by some local kid who shouted, ‘Look! The cow lady’s shopping!’ and it was humiliating enough.”
”…Yeah.”
Cow ogres are a minority tribe living near the Great Desert Labyrinth in central Celesta, known for their distinctly bovine features. Kelly being called “cow” was nothing new, so Earnie struggled to respond.
Kelly didn’t seem angry about it either; he just let out a long sigh.
“If someone calls me that, I’ll just flex and say, ‘I’m not a cow—I’m an ogre!’ and see how they react.”
”…Flexing? Really?”
“It’s hilarious! Next time some kid scares you, try it yourself.”
Kelly Isaac was surprisingly fond of children.
“Still, at the time we were practically crawling on all fours, so I couldn’t even strike a pose. Even if someone called me a cow, I couldn’t deny it, and it made me furious.”
”…If only shops were built to our size…”
“That would be great.”
Unfortunately, due to limitations in construction technology (aside from castles and military facilities), residential buildings rarely accommodated such large dimensions.
The two of them rolled along the main street with their handcart until they reached their usual general store. Basson was currently one of the fastest-growing cities in Celesta.
Rapid development meant lots of construction work, which also brought many ogre construction workers to the area. So having two ogres together didn’t make them stand out at all.
“Well then, Boyd. You go ahead and place the order.”
“Me?”
“I won’t forget that humiliation anytime soon.”
”…Yeah.”
Well, Earnie could probably squeeze through if he bent down a bit. He accepted the task and stepped into the store.
That’s when it happened.
THUD!
“Whoa—!?”
“W-What was that?! What’s going on?!”
A deafening roar echoed across the sky, louder than thunder itself, shaking the very ground beneath them.
Ernie and Kelly leaped into the air. It wasn’t just them who were startled; residents from all over the town poked their heads out, darting their eyes around nervously.
Amidst the commotion, a carriage thundered past the corner ahead at breakneck speed.
“Yaaaah!!”
From the driver’s seat of that carriage, an old man tumbled off as it turned the corner.
“W-what happened! What in the world is going on!?”
“T-the horse got spooked and won’t listen to me anymore… Daaaaa!!”
“Old man!?”
As Kelly helped him up (more like picked him up), the elderly man cried out in agony, his arm clearly broken.
“Damn it, I need a doctor…”
“W-wait a minute! There are still passengers on that carriage! A girl!”
“What do you mean!?”
Indeed, the carriage was careening wildly, as if about to flip over.
At this rate, no one could predict what would ultimately happen. Kelly gritted her teeth.
“Damn it.”
“Sergeant! Let’s do something about that!”
Ernie tapped Kelly on the shoulder.
Kelly blinked and looked at Ernie.
”…Do you think we can?”
“We’re the strongest Celesta Army, after all.”
“I said so.”
Ernie was young and dreamed of serving in the military. It was a seemingly obvious yet difficult truth: soldiers are those who rush to save citizens in crisis first. Having served for so long, he had almost forgotten that heart, too busy wielding his sword to notice it slipping away.
Kelly smiled. Though the face of an ox-ogre can look terrifying when smiling, Ernie felt nothing but reassurance at her expression.
“Let’s go!! Follow me, Void!”
“Yessir!!”
The two ogres sprinted forward. The citizens of Basson held their breath, awestruck by the sheer power of the giants’ full-speed charge.
An ogre’s massive frame even serves as an advantage while moving.
A trained ogre’s sprint is incredibly fast, proportional to its huge lower body. While it couldn’t catch up to a bare horse, it could at least keep pace with something as heavy as a carriage.
However, the dozen or so seconds it took to make their decision had cost them dearly; they still couldn’t close the gap. After running hundreds of meters, they hadn’t yet reached within arm’s length of the fleeing carriage.
“Damn it… Void, if we keep going like this, we’ll lose sight of Main Street!”
“Yessir!”
“All or nothing, you fly!”
”…Huh?”
Kelly’s words left Earnie momentarily at a loss. Of course they did. There was no way jumping down such a perfectly paved road would make him any faster. Still, Kelly, as the seasoned captain of ten, had an established reputation for flashes of tactical brilliance in critical moments. He might look like an ox, but his mind wasn’t as dull as his appearance suggested.
“I’m gonna throw you so hard that you’ll rescue the passengers from the carriage!”
”…Eh? Eh?!?”
Even so, it was quite a reckless plan.
Yet Earnie knew only too well that Kelly was an outstanding captain; if he said something could be done, it would be done.
”…Understood! I’ll do it!”
“Say wha—AAAAAAAAAAH!!”
Decisive action. Seizing Earnie’s arm, Kelly bulged every muscle in his massive frame, swelling even more than already imposing.
With that raw power, he hurled Earnie forward with all his might.
“Gaaahhh!!” Spinning end over end, Earnie soared through the air above Basson’s main thoroughfare at seven meters high, tracing a perfect parabola before—
“Gaaaaaahh!” He slammed onto the carriage roof—or rather, blew it off and sank deep into its structure.
“Hiiiii!!” Silvia MacLean, seated inside, froze in terror. The carriage was already careening wildly; suddenly, an ogre burst through the roof and crashed down upon them. It was terrifying.
But Earnie shook his head and rose to his feet. At the end of the main street stood a tavern. If the horses kept charging at full speed, they’d soon fail to turn and crash into it—it was almost inevitable. It was right before him now. With part of his body protruding from the carriage, Earnie felt panic rising.
“Gaaahhh!!” There was no time for thought. Instinctively, he reached out—grasping something soft,
THWACK!!
A moment later, as the horses attempted to turn, the carriage couldn’t keep up and tipped over just as predicted, slamming violently against the wall.
◇◇◇
Two days later, Earnie woke up. ”…Boyd! Boyd’s awake!” Wrapped in fluffy blankets at the town clinic, Earnie shifted slightly. His body creaked in various places, but he seemed to have all five limbs intact. Seeing him like this, Captain Diane let out a relieved sigh. Thrilled that someone had been worried about him, Earnie suddenly burst into tears and murmured, “I’m sorry.”
Hearing her voice, Silvia MacLean—the girl he’d saved—rushed into the room first and threw herself at him. “Phew…!!”
Earnie’s final act had been to protect Silvia unharmed.
Amidst the collision with the wall and the crushing weight of the carriage, Earnie’s massive hand had shielded Sylvia completely.
The first thing Sylvia saw upon waking was Earnie—his form half-collapsed against the mortar wall yet still gently holding her, protecting her.
And then…
”……Um! I’ll take care of Void-san from now on!”
“No, no need. It’s my fault.”
“You saved my life! Let me do it!!”
”……U-uh…”
Overwhelmed, Sylvia ended up assisting him with everything from meals to bathroom needs for about ten days afterward.
Then came a month later.
”……Isaac, could we swap tomorrow’s cleaning duty with another day?”
“Oh, what’s up, Void? Going on a date with that human girl again?”
”……Please don’t be surprised. It seems like it.”
”…………WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?”
Kelly stood up shouting as the other squad members gathered around. “What’s going on? Explain yourself, Isaac!”
“Oh, hey, Smyson. Seems this idiot is going on a date with a human girl.”
“For real?”
“For sure.”
“What do you mean, Void!”
“I-I don’t know! Honestly, I have no idea either!”
The next day. Dressed in Kelly’s old sea-beast leather jacket, accessories like the belt and bracers crafted by Andy, a clean shirt thoroughly laundered by Diane, and stylish boots designed by Anzeros, Earnie arrived for his meeting with Sylvia. ”…………” He wondered if he might be getting teased. Yet, the high-quality parchment suitable only for mockery was too expensive, and the letter written upon it overflowed with sincerity.
──Dear Earnie-san, I’d like to invite you on a date. Let’s meet at the arena together from noon this Sunday. Believing you’ll come, I’ll be waiting in front of that tavern. Sylvia
The tavern’s walls were still unrepaired; painful memories resurfaced.
Earnie’s single horn had snapped halfway through due to the impact of the collision.
”……I wonder if my horn is gone.”
Suddenly thinking this, he approached the collapsed wall. As he carefully examined the rubble and ground, he spotted his target half-buried among the debris.
”……Haha, there it is.”
“What is it?”
“U-uh, w-wah, Miss Sylvia!?”
“Hello, Earnie-kun!”
Sylvia stood before Earnie, peering down at him. Overwhelmed by nervousness and desperately trying to mask it, Earnie hadn’t noticed a thing.
“Oh, um…”
“Yeah. If you don’t want to say anything, that’s fine. But… hey?”
“Y-yes! I understand!”
She extended her hand toward his chest. Earnie gently took it, resting his palm over the base of her fingers.
”…D-dating me… are you serious?”
“Did you think I was lying?”
”…But I’m an Ogre, after all.”
Ever since Sylvia realized she was a year older than Earnie, she’d suddenly started acting like an older sister. By the way, Earnie is 18, and Sylvia is 19. Even though they’re young, an Ogre’s face can be intimidating and scary. Yet, as if teasing him one moment and embracing him the next, Sylvia’s presence created such a striking mismatch with Earnie that it felt almost comical.
“Heheh… I just really like your hands, Earnie-kun.”
”?”
”…I don’t know why. When you squeezed me tightly back then, wrapped around me, my heart skipped a beat. It felt so warm.”
“Haa…”
“So that’s not okay?”
”…Eh?”
“The reason I fell for you.”
“E-eh?!?”
When she casually said she liked him, Earnie was flustered beyond words. Sylvia smiled with evident delight at his innocent reaction and firmly grasped his index finger, which was barely as thick as a child’s forearm.
“Once you fall in love, it’s strange, isn’t it? No matter what you do, I can’t help but find you adorable.”
”…A-adorable?”
Having never been called “adorable” before, Earnie wore an expression he couldn’t quite interpret. Sylvia gently pulled his hand and led him happily toward the arena.
The arena was empty that day—no events were scheduled. On days like this, it remained open to the public, serving as a place for citizens to enjoy track and field or ball games. There weren’t many spectators eager to watch such an uneventful scene, so the stands they entered were nearly deserted.
“Back then, it was because of that magic show.”
”?”
“That loud boom sound—the horses got spooked by it.”
“Oh… I see.”
The Capital University Department of Magic Research focused solely on studying magic; it wasn’t staffed with exceptionally powerful practitioners. Even when things went wrong, the magical forces involved were relatively weak compared to alchemy, where failures could be far more destructive. As a result, minor mishaps were often tolerated as if they were inevitable disasters.
“That’s why someone almost died—it was unbearable.”
“Yeah, absolutely. If Ernie had died, I might have hated magic shows for the rest of my life.”
”……We’re not gonna die anytime soon, Sylvia. You were the one who was supposed to die back there.”
“Yeah… but, just a little bit, I’m grateful for that. If it hadn’t happened, I never would’ve met Ernie.”
”…………”
Ernie turned red, shrinking his large frame and scratching his head frantically. At such an overtly innocent reaction, even Sylvia blushed.
They stared at each other silently for a few moments before Sylvia broke the awkward silence by changing the subject.
“By the way, when I was little, I couldn’t see anything interesting at the arena. My dad used to carry me on his shoulders all the time.”
“H-huh?”
“When he carried me, everything in the world looked different. I kept asking him to do it until I grew up quite a bit.”
She smiled, then leaned back against Ernie’s shoulder in a coquettish tone.
”……Ernie, will you carry me on your shoulders?”
“I-it’s okay!?”
“No? Well, if you’re as big as Ernie, I thought you could probably handle someone my size…”
“N-no, well, carrying one or two humans isn’t too hard… but, uh, it means touching your butt!”
”……Pfft. Ahahaha!!”
Hearing Ernie’s utterly ridiculous comment, Sylvia burst into laughter, while Ernie froze, wondering if he’d said something strange.
“It’s fine, it’s fine! Carrying you on the shoulders is off-limits! Come on, get on, get on!”
“H-haa… okay then, I’m going!”
Ernie carefully lifted Sylvia onto his shoulders, supporting her waist and knees gently.
Suddenly, Sylvia’s view shot upward. The world transformed before her eyes.
“Waaaah… this is amazing, so amazing!”
”……Haa, um, that…”
Since Ernie was holding her tightly against his chest, she felt a bit distracted. A few seconds later, she realized her skirt was slightly short; if she stayed like this, her underwear would be fully exposed to the crowd. Panicking, she quickly shifted her body position in small, jerky movements.
Her motions looked so much like she was being cooed at that Sylvia giggled like a child.
After spending some time doing that, Sylvia suddenly began patting Ernie’s head repeatedly.
When Ernie waited for her to say something, a curious voice came from above his head.
”……Ernie, your horn on the left… it’s not there. Was it missing from the start?”
“No. It happened a while ago.”
It wasn’t that long ago—just a few years—but Ernie tried to put on a bit of an act. Using the word “long ago” made him feel like he belonged in the same category as older people, giving him a sense of maturity. ”…………”
Seeing that he was waiting for more, Ernie cleared his throat.
Although he didn’t think it was something he usually shared with others, since Sylvia had confessed her feelings for him, he figured it was okay to tell her now. Besides, there was plenty of time.
”……I’m from an ogre colony near the coast close to the border with Afilum. That place was right next to the Dragon Palace.”
“Yeah, yeah…”
“I once helped a lone dragon there. They were so grateful that they gave me one of their secret treasures as a reward.”
“Wow, really?”
Dragons are the strongest and most solitary race among all species. They avoid contact with other races and live exclusively within Dragon Palace, a hidden sanctuary they have formed. Their treasures possess astronomical value and have long been the object of adventurers’ covetous desires.
“I brought that treasure back to the colony… but everyone assumed I’d stolen it from the dragons and got furious.”
“Eh…?”
“As punishment, they pulled out my horn. It hurt beyond words.”
Arnie’s encounter with the dragon was purely coincidental. While hunting in the mountains, he found a young dragon lying unconscious, suffering from a high fever.
Dragons are not the same as flying dragons; they possess intelligence comparable to that of humans and apes. In their daily lives, they appear human-like. If they were to live in their true forms, even Dragon Palace would be too small to accommodate them, making it impossible for them to maintain their hidden sanctuary.
Seeing this young dragon, Arnie felt a mix of awe toward the legendary creatures and, being still a child himself, bravely carried him all the way to Dragon Palace. Grateful for his kindness, the dragons presented him with a treasure: a beautiful gem known as the Dragon’s Jade, an unblemished, indestructible jewel of supreme quality.
When Arnie returned with it, the adults were stunned. It was inconceivable that dragons would entrust such a valuable item to a child like him. They concluded he had sneaked into Dragon Palace and taken it as a prank. Fearing retribution, they decided to make him atone on their own terms.
They restrained Arnie, who cried out that he hadn’t lied, and pulled out his horn as punishment. Then they sent him back up the mountain to apologize to the dragons. The adults intended him as a sacrifice, and young Arnie could feel it viscerally.
“The wound from having my horn pulled out was agonizing, almost fatal, and then rain started falling—it was a terrible night. I stumbled into Dragon Palace and apologized as instructed… but the dragon people cried and begged for forgiveness. They said they’d done something awful and asked me to forgive them. They had only given me that treasure, yet seeing my injury made them weep so profusely that it filled me with immense joy.”
”…Arnie, you…”
“But since I was meant as a sacrifice, I can’t return. So I asked the dragon people to treat my wound and then joined the army in Quieka… In my hometown, I’m supposed to be dead already. Hahaha.”
”…”
“That’s why, honestly, I prefer other races over ogres. Being kind to me from other races makes me so happy. It makes me feel like I deserve to live. Oh, um, but I never thought someone as beautiful as Sylvia would say she likes me—I got carried away today, hahaha.”
”…I’m sorry!!”
“Hah… eh?”
Suddenly apologized to from above, Arnie was startled. He had anticipated the conversation might take a sentimental turn, but he hadn’t expected such an abrupt apology.
However, Sylvia continued; she stroked his broken right horn with her finger, then clung tightly to his large head and began sobbing uncontrollably.
“Huuu… ghh… I’m sorry… I, I… I liked you because you’re big, so I just said I like you without thinking… Eeeww… I’m sorry… Your horn broke, and it broke because of me—it was your last remaining horn!”
“It’s okay! The root is still there, so the right one will grow back.”
“But, but oh… Ugh… I… You… That… So much… I don’t understand ‘liking’ someone that deeply, I can’t comprehend it… I’m sorry. I’ll get better soon, properly… Arnie-kun, I’ll properly like you again…”
“Oh, calm down, calm down. I don’t need anything about ‘properly’ or all that—I’m just happy that Sylvia likes me.”
“Aaa-nee-kuuun!! Ueeeeeeeeennn!!!”
Sylvia seemed utterly overwhelmed and burst into irrational, uncontrollable weeping. Arnie was flustered—extremely so.
Sylvia continued to sob intermittently until dusk fell.
”…I’m sorry, Arnie-kun. You’re pitiful, and I got a bit confused.”
“Hah… Well, at least it was nice to see Sylvia’s cute side.”
It was supposed to be behind my head, so I couldn’t see it.
Silvia rubbed her nose with a shh-shh motion, then made a “muh” sound as her serious face tilted upward to look at Earnie.
“Well, let me say it again… I, Silvia MacLean, truly like you, Earnie-kun. I’ve come to like you.”
“H-hai!”
”…So, um…”
”…”
”…”
Stall. With Silvia’s face still flushed and her head bowed in embarrassment, Earnie too found himself at a loss, his own cheeks burning.
Just then, in the corner of Earnie’s wide field of vision, he spotted a familiar bull-like face. ”!?” It was Kelly. And beneath her feet stood Andy. Andy sat cross-legged, pointing his thumb downward in a silent boo—extremely unbecoming. Kelly thrust her fist forward in front of her face, gah-gah, signaling “Go! Get out!” Earnie was utterly baffled by their antics, but after a moment’s thought, he grasped the meaning behind Kelly’s “Go!” gesture. That’s right. Earnie had to move forward. This was precisely the kind of situation that called for it. “Um…” At the sound of Earnie’s voice, Silvia snapped her head up. Earnie bent at the waist, locking eyes with her seriously as he spoke. “I also… I really like you too, Silvia-san… s-so much. I’d like to be your boyfriend.” ”…Hai!” With a soft shhh, Silvia stepped closer and pressed her delicate lips against the giant ogre’s massive ones in a kiss. The setting sun sliced across the mountain ridgeline, casting a gentle shadow over the lovers.
◇◇◇
“Captain of the Ten Smithsons.”
“Huh? Oh, isn’t that Private Boyd with his girlfriend?”
“U-um… I was hoping to ask you something about her.”
“Tch. What now? Do you want another custom accessory? My sense is terrible; they don’t work every time.”
“No, well, it’s not exactly an accessory…”
”…Ah, right. In that case, sure. Just wait a moment.”
Silvia usually worked frying food at a convenience store tucked away in a corner of Basson Town. That evening, unusually, Earnie appeared without an appointment. “Sorry… the sign’s already up… Ah, it’s you, Earnie-kun!” “Silvia-san. Um… could I have this?” Suddenly thrust into Silvia’s hands was a small accessory. It was a necklace handmade by Andy: a piece of paint applied to one of Earnie’s horns, with holes drilled through it and a thin chain threaded inside.
“Eh… what is this?”
“Yes. I want my horns to be with someone I love.”
“Whew… damn it, listen up, you lot! Right now I’m stuck in a place like this, but back home there’s an absolutely stunning beauty! Big breasts! A waist that cinches right here! And she loves me more than anything! Plus, you’re a half-elf!”
“Aww, yeah, here we go again with Smayson the Captain’s fantasy girl talk.”
“Is that all the time you have? Boss, let’s wrap up the tab soon.”
“I said it wasn’t in my head! I’m not talking about Void’s girlfriend or whatever! Listen here, you idiot!”
The crossbow squad shared drinks tonight, a peaceful gathering of many races.