Ogres are a race with one to three horns on their heads and are generally a giant-like species. While not as powerful as the giant race said to live across the western sea, in the northwest plains, including Trot Celesta, they are arguably the strongest in terms of raw strength. Their naturally massive bodies and strength guarantee combat prowess that renders ordinary weapons almost irrelevant. According to the official tactical index of the Celesta Army, if a fully armored standard human male and a lightly equipped dwarf soldier are both rated as one, a bare-handed ogre male is equivalent to 2.5. In other words, no matter how heavily armored a human foot soldier is, engaging an unarmed ogre with fewer than two soldiers is a tactical taboo. With proper armament, they become a combat power of 5 in a single stroke. A single one is worth a full cavalry charge. The ogres’ flamboyant fighting style is the highlight of any battlefield. Against five such ogre soldiers, how rare an ace knight must be to hold his own against even one of them is left to the reader’s imagination.
But I digress.
The ogres’ massive bodies and, at times, monstrous appearances tend to appear grotesque to human eyes—a fact acknowledged by everyone, including the ogres themselves. Of course, ogres don’t necessarily find humans beautiful either. In their opinion, human women are “too thin and weak to be reassuring” and “cute but fail to arouse desire—they’re like livestock, only capable of shallow affection.” Naturally, ogres have their own standards of beauty—a balance in their sexual sensibilities. Ogre women aren’t as muscular as the men, but they are undeniably tall, and as a racial characteristic, their genitalia are exceptionally flexible, possessing robust bodies capable of accommodating an ogre’s penis (which averages nearly 50 centimeters) even by instinctively shifting their internal organs to make room. Furthermore, ogre women are generally energetic, and in some regions, matriarchal societies with polyandry still persist. Tall, spirited, and strong women who can take on men are considered “good women” in ogre culture—precisely the opposite of the idealized gentlewomen of current human society.
Therefore, even in Celesta, where inter-species marriage is legally recognized, unions between ogres and humans rarely occur. Despite coexisting in society, they are perceived as almost entirely “different species,” unlike humans and elves.
Amidst all this, there was an ogre youth who had overcome numerous hurdles to gain a human lover.
Arnie Boyd. A new recruit in the Trident Trading Company’s Northern Legion Crossbow Corps stationed near Basson, a trading city in northern Celesta, holding the rank of Private.
This is the story of that miraculous couple.
Or maybe I’m getting a little carried away. It’s not quite a miracle. But it’s still pretty amazing.
◇◇◇
Basson has shared horse carriages that circulate through the town. They don’t go fast, stopping frequently to pick up and drop off passengers, but the fares are cheap, and they’re flexible. It’s a public service run by retired riding horses taking leisurely strolls.
Sylvia MacLean told the carriage driver she wanted to go to the large arena on the opposite side of town.
That day, a magic show was scheduled at the arena.
Here, “magic” doesn’t mean sleight of hand—it’s real magic. Once a year, researchers from the Capital University’s School of Magic perform visually entertaining spells across Celesta to earn research funding.
This annual magic show is Sylvia’s favorite event of the year.
“…♪”
“You seem in high spirits, miss.”
Sylvia returned the old driver’s words with a beaming smile.
“Yes, I always look forward to the magic show.”
“Oh, that’s right—it’s that time of year. I might as well watch it while I’m delivering you.”
“You’d be missing out if you didn’t, sir!”
“Hah hah hah, well, as long as no other passengers get on before we reach the arena.”
Pock-pock, pock-pock, clatter-clatter.
The carriage ambled toward the arena at its leisurely pace.
Arnie was on shopping duty that day.
Arnie Boyd (Plain Ogre, 6’8”) and Kelly Isaac (Bull Ogre, 10’2”) were hauling a handcart together to Basson.
“Why do we have to go on supply run duty?”
“Shoulda just made some humans do it.”
Complaining about being on supply duty was the same old song and dance for everyone.
But there was a reason why these two were grumbling.
Arnie and Kelly couldn’t fit in a carriage.
Well, technically, troop transport carriages could accommodate ogres, but they couldn’t sit on the driver’s platform.
So when these two were on duty, they had to use a hand-pulled cart instead. Even for strong ogre tribesmen, doing a job that horses could easily handle was pretty frustrating.
“Besides, the ceiling in that general store is way too low.”
“At your height, you’re practically crawling on all fours.”
“Before you came in there, I was trying to place an order and some brat pointed at me yelling, ‘The bull’s shopping!’”
”…Huh.”
Bull ogres were a small ethnic group clustered near the Desert Great Labyrinth in Central Celesta, generally having bull-like faces. Kelly being called “bull” was nothing new, so Arnie didn’t know how to react.
Kelly didn’t seem particularly angry either; he just sighed.
“When they say that, I always do a muscle pose and yell, ‘I’m not a bull, I’m an ogre!’”
”…Muscle pose, huh?”
“It’s hilarious. Try it next time some kid tries to scare you.”
Kelly Isaac was surprisingly fond of kids.
“But since I was practically crawling at the time, I couldn’t strike a pose. And even if they called me a bull, I couldn’t deny it, so I was super pissed.”
”…I wish they’d make things in our size sometimes.”
“Tell me about it.”
Due to architectural limitations (castles and military facilities aside), houses weren’t exactly built for ogres.
The two of them groaned as they dragged the cart down the main street, finally stopping in front of their usual general store.
Basson was currently one of the fastest-growing cities in Celesta.
Fast growth meant a lot of construction work, and plenty of ogre construction workers. A pair of ogres wasn’t particularly unusual.
“Alright, Boyd. You take the order.”
“Me?”
“I’ll never forget that humiliation.”
”…Huh.”
Well, Arnie could squeeze in if he bent over a bit. He took the reins and stepped into the general store.
That’s when it happened.
THUDONNN!!
“Uwoooah!?”
“W-What, what was that!?”
A deafening roar, like thunder itself, echoed across the azure sky. The ground trembled.
Arnie and Kelly jumped. Not just them, but people from all over the city popped their heads out, looking around in confusion.
Then, a carriage sped past the corner at breakneck speed.
“Hyaaah!”
An old man tumbled off the driver’s seat as it went by.
“W-what happened!? What was that!?”
“M-my horse got spooked and won’t listen anymore… ickk!”
“Grandpa!?”
Kelly helped him up (or rather, picked him up), and the old man winced in pain. He seemed to have broken his arm.
“Damn it, a doctor…”
“W-wait a minute! There are still passengers on that carriage! A girl!”
“What?!”
The carriage was careening out of control, almost flipping over. If it kept going like that, who knew what would happen. Kelly gritted her teeth.
“Damn it.”
“Ten-tenchō! We have to do something about that!”
Arnie slapped Kelly on the shoulder.
Kelly snapped to attention and looked at Arnie.
”…You think we can?”
“We’re the strongest Celesta soldiers, after all.”
“I said it.”
Arnie was young and full of dreams for the military. Like how soldiers are supposed to be the first to help civilians in danger—something that sounds obvious but is actually hard. After being in the military for so long, he’d become too used to swinging a sword and had forgotten that part of his heart.
Kelly laughed. A bull ogre’s face looks terrifying when smiling, but Arnie found that smile more reassuring than anything.
“Let’s go!! Follow me, Boyd!”
“Uss!”
The two ogres took off running. The citizens of Basson stared in awe at the sheer power of their sprinting giants.
An ogre’s massive size is an advantage even when moving.
A trained ogre’s sprint is fast in proportion to its enormous lower body. It couldn’t catch a bare horse, but it could manage to chase after a heavy carriage like that.
But those dozen seconds of hesitation made it hard to catch up. After running several hundred meters, they still hadn’t closed the distance enough.
“Damn it… Boyd, if we keep going at this pace, we’ll reach Main Street!”
“Uss!”
“It’s now or never! You jump!”
”…Huh?”
Arnie couldn’t follow Kelly’s logic for a second. Of course not. No matter how much he jumped on this smooth road, it wouldn’t make him go any faster.
But Kelly was the squad leader, and his tactical flashes were legendary. Sure, he had the face of a bull, but his mind wasn’t as dim-witted as one might think.
“I’m gonna chuck you forward, so you can save the passengers from the carriage!” ”…Eh? Eh!?”
Even so, it was an insane plan.
But Arnie believed in Kelly’s competence as squad leader. If he said it could be done, then it could be done.
”…Got it. I’ll do it!” “O-Oh… Uuuuughhhhhh!!”
Instant decision. Kelly grabbed Arnie’s arm and bulged out his muscles. This giant of a man looked even bigger, swelling up like that.
With all that power, he launched Arnie forward with full force.
“U-OOOOH!!”
Arnie spun through the air. Seven meters above Basson’s main street, tracing a perfect parabola, Arnie—
“Ogaaaaah!”
Thud. He crashed onto the carriage roof—or rather, smashed through it and embedded himself in it.
“Hii!!”
Sylvia MacLean, who was inside, froze in terror. The carriage had been careening out of control, shaking violently, and then an ogre suddenly burst through the roof—no wonder she was scared.
But Arnie shook his head and pushed himself up.
At the end of the main street was a tavern. If the horses kept running at that breakneck speed, they’d inevitably crash into it when they couldn’t turn the corner.
And that was right in front of him.
Arnie, half-stuck in the carriage, felt desperation.
“U-AAAAAAH!!”
He didn’t think—he just reached out reflexively. Grabbed something soft—
Donggggh!
A moment later, the horses tried to turn, but the carriage couldn’t follow, and predictably, it tilted and slammed into the wall.
◇◇◇
Arnie woke up two days later.
”…Boyd! Boyd’s awake!”
In a fluffy bed at the town clinic, Arnie shifted slightly. His joints creaked, but all five limbs seemed to be intact.
Seeing Arnie like that, Diane, the hundred-man leader, looked relieved.
Hearing that, Sylvia MacLean—whom he’d saved—was the first to rush into the room and throw herself at Arnie.
“I’m so glad…”
She was the girl he’d rescued.
Arnie’s last act had been to protect Sylvia unharmed.
In the collision with the wall and the crushing of the carriage, Arnie’s massive hand had managed to protect Sylvia.
When Sylvia awoke, the first thing she saw was Arnie gently holding her, protecting her while half-destroying the mortar wall.
And then… “…Um, I’ll take care of you, Mr. Boyd!” “No, it’s okay. Sorry.” “You’re my lifesaver, so please let me!” “…U-uh, yeah…”
Overwhelmed by her insistence, he ended up having Sylvia help him with everything—meals, even going to the bathroom—for about ten days.
And then, a month passed. “…Isaac, squad leader. Could you maybe change my cleaning duty to another day tomorrow?” “Oh? What’s up, Boyd? You gonna go on a date with that human girl or something?” “…I’d appreciate it if you didn’t be so surprised. Looks like I am.” “…………What did he say!?”
Kelly stood up with a thud, shouting. The other squad members gathered around, wondering what was going on. “What’s this? What’s happening? Explain yourself, Isaac.” “Y-yeah, Smymson. This idiot here says he’s got a date with a human girl.” “No way.” “Yeah, it’s true.” “What’s the deal, Boyd!” “I-I don’t know, I really don’t get it either.”
The next day.
Arnie was wearing Kelly’s old sea-beast hide jacket, some belt and bracelets Andy had made, a shirt that Diane had thoroughly cleaned, and a pair of cool shoes Anzeros had picked out—all together.
“…………”
He thought he might be getting teased.
But the parchment was too good for mockery, and the letter written on it overflowed with sincerity.
──Arnie-kun. This is an invitation to a date.
Let’s go to the arena together from noon on Sunday.
I’ll be waiting in front of that tavern, believing you’ll come.
Sincerely, Sylvia
The tavern wall was still unrepaired. Painful memories resurfaced.
Arnie’s single horn had snapped cleanly off halfway down due to the impact.
“…I wonder if my horn’s still around…”
On a whim, he approached the collapsed wall. Carefully scanning the wall and ground, he spotted what he was looking for—half-buried in the dirt.
“…Haha, there it is.”
“What is it?”
“U-uh, Sylvia-san!?” “Hello, Arnie-kun.”
Sylvia stood, peering over his shoulder at what he was doing. Arnie was so nervous that he was desperately trying to hide it, and hadn’t noticed her at all. “Ah, um…” “Yeah. It’s okay if you don’t want to say anything. More importantly…?” “Y-yes! Got it!”
She turned her palm up and offered him her hand. Arnie gently placed his own over hers, resting his fingers on the back of hers. ”…B-but, a date with me… are you serious, sis?” “Did you think I was kidding?” ”…Because I’m an ogre, y’know.”
Ever since Sylvia realized she was only one year older than Arnie, she’d suddenly started acting all mature and stuff. For the record: Arnie’s 18. Sylvia’s 19. Even for someone young, an ogre’s face is intimidatingly fierce. Sylvia, who would tease him like that or sometimes wrap around him protectively, was a pretty mismatched pair with Arnie.
“Hehe. …You know, I really like your hands, Arnie-kun.” ”?!” ”…Just somehow. When you squeezed me tight back then, and wrapped me up, it kinda made my heart flutter. It felt so warm.” “Huh.” “Is that bad?” ”…Eh?” “Why I fell for you.” “Eh?!?”
Arnie was flustered by the casual “I like you.” Sylvia grinned, clearly amused by his innocent reaction, and squeezed Arnie’s index finger—which was about as thick as a child’s arm.
“Once you fall for someone, it’s weird, isn’t it? No matter what they’re doing, they just seem cute.” “U-um… cute?” “Mmm~”
Arnie, who’d never been called cute before, made an indescribable face. Sylvia pulled on his finger and happily led him toward the arena.
The arena wasn’t hosting any events that day. On days when nothing was scheduled, it was open to the public as a place for citizens to relax—people enjoying track and field or ball games. Since there were no performances to watch, the stands where Arnie and Sylvia entered were almost completely empty.
“About that time… it was all because of the magic show.” ”?!” “That thud sound. The one that startled the horse.” “Oh… I see.”
The College of Magic’s research department only studies magic; they don’t have any particularly skilled practitioners.
Even if they fail, the amount of power they can wield with magic is small, and the damage is far less than alchemy experiments, so there’s even a sense that some failures are tolerated as if they were minor disasters.
“And since it almost killed someone, it’s pretty hilarious, y’know?”
“Yeah. Seriously. If Arnie had died, I might have hated magic shows forever.” ”…We don’t die that easily, you know? Sylvia was the one who almost died.” “Yeah… but, I’m a little grateful, actually. If that hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t have met Arnie.” ”…………”
Arnie’s face turned red. He hunched his large frame and scratched his head sheepishly. Sylvia, who had said it, blushed even more at his overly obvious and innocent reaction. After a few minutes of awkwardly sizing each other up, Sylvia changed the subject to break the stagnant atmosphere. “By the way, when I was little, I couldn’t see anything when I came to the arena. My dad used to carry me on his shoulders.” “Huh… huh.” “When he carried me, the whole world looked different. I begged him for it until I was pretty big.”
She smiled and leaned back against Arnie’s shoulder in a pleading voice. ”…Arnie, will you carry me on your shoulders?” “I-I’m okay!?” “You’re not? I thought if you were this big, you could probably carry someone like me…” “N-no, well, carrying a couple of humans is easy enough… but, uh, I’d have to touch your butt or something.” ”…Pfft. Ahahahahaha!!”
Sylvia burst out laughing at Arnie’s ridiculously awkward words. Arnie blinked in confusion, wondering if he’d said something strange. “It’s okay, it’s okay! Shoulder rides are free! Come on, let me carry you!” “O-okay… then I’ll go.”
Arnie carefully lifted Sylvia onto his shoulders, trying to support her waist and knees as much as possible. Sylvia’s view instantly rose higher. The world changed. “Wow… amazing, amazing!” ”…Uh, well…”
Arnie felt his head being held tightly, making his chest press against her nape and leaving him distracted. A few seconds later, he noticed Sylvia’s skirt was a bit short, and in this position, he’d be exposing her underwear to the whole arena. He frantically shifted his body slightly to adjust. The movement made it seem like he was tickling Sylvia, and she giggled like a child.
They did that for a while until Sylvia suddenly started patting Arnie’s head. Arnie waited, wondering what she wanted, when a curious voice came from above. ”…Arnie, your horn… on the left… it’s not there. Was it always like that?” “No. I used to have one.”
It wasn’t that long ago. Just a few years back, but Arnie decided to brag a little. Using the word “used to” made him feel older and a bit more important. ”…………”
She seemed to be waiting for him to continue, so Arnie cleared his throat. He didn’t usually talk about it much, but since Sylvia had said she liked him, he figured it was okay to tell her. Besides, it’d fill the silence. ”…I’m from an ogre colony near the border with Affilum. There was a dragon palace nearby.” “Yeah, yeah.”
“I helped a dragon once, right there. He was super grateful and gave me one of his treasure as thanks.” “That’s amazing!”
Dragons. The strongest and most solitary race of all. They have no dealings with other races, forming hidden settlements called Dragon Palaces where they live exclusively. Their treasures are astronomically valuable, the object of every adventurer’s desire.
“I brought it back to the colony… but they decided I must’ve stolen the dragon’s treasure and got super mad at me.” “Huh…?” “As punishment, they pulled out one of my horns. It hurt like hell.”
Arnie helping a dragon was purely accidental. While hunting in the mountains, Arnie came across a young dragon who had collapsed with a fever.
Dragons are a different species from flying dragons. They have about the same intelligence as monkeys and apes, and dragon-kind usually lives in humanoid form. If they lived in their true forms, even the vast Dragon Palace wouldn’t be enough space—they wouldn’t be able to maintain their hidden settlements.
Seeing the young dragon, Arnie felt a legendary awe for dragons, but also knew he was still just a kid himself. So bravely, he carried him on his back all the way to the Dragon Palace.
Grateful for his kindness, the dragon offered him one of his treasures—a beautiful dragon pearl, an unblemished and unbreakable gem of the highest quality.
The adults were speechless when Arnie brought it back. A dragon giving such a valuable item to a child like that was impossible. They decided he must have sneaked into the Dragon Palace and taken it as a prank.
And, arbitrarily fearing revenge and arbitrarily assigning atonement, they decided to punish him. They pinned down Arnie, who cried that he hadn’t lied, and forcibly pulled out one of his horns as punishment. Then they made him climb the mountain and apologize to the dragons. The adults intended it as a sacrifice, and even young Arnie could feel it in his bones.
“The wound from the pulled-out horn was agonizing, and it started raining—it was a terrible night. I staggered into the Dragon Palace and apologized like they told me to… then the dragon person apologized to me, crying. ‘I did something terrible, please forgive me.’ They’d just given me a treasure, but seeing my wound made them cry so hard, which made me really happy.” ”…Arnie…” “But I’m a sacrifice now, so I can’t go back. So I just had the dragon person treat my wound and then left for Quieca to become a soldier… In my hometown, they probably think I’m dead. Hahaha.” ”…………” “That’s why, really, I like people of other races more than ogres. When people of other races are kind to me, it makes me so happy. It makes me feel like I’m allowed to live. Ah, um, but I never thought someone as beautiful as Sylvia would say they liked me—I was just flustered today, hahaha.” ”…I’m sorry!!” “Haha… huh?”
Arnie was surprised when Sylvia suddenly apologized from above him. He knew the conversation had gotten a little emotional, but he hadn’t expected an apology.
But Sylvia continued, gently stroking his broken right horn with her finger before clinging to Arnie’s large head and bursting into tears. “H-hi, s-so sorry… I, I, I just liked you because you’re big, and I said I liked you… a-ah, sorry… even though you broke your horn, it was my fault, and it was the last one standing…” “I-it’s okay, the root’s still there, so the right side will grow back.” “B-but, but oh… ugh… I, I, you’re… so… heavy, I don’t know how to handle it, I don’t understand… s-sorry, I’ll l-learn to like you properly… Arnie, I’ll like you properly again…”
“C-calm down, calm down. I, I don’t need you to like me properly, Sylvia-san, I’m just happy you liked me.” “Arnieeeeee! Ughhhhhhhh!”
Sylvia was overcome with emotion and began crying without reason. Arnie was troubled. Very troubled. Sylvia continued sobbing until sunset.
”…Sorry, Arnie-kun, I got a little overwhelmed because you were so pitiful.” “Haha… well, it’s good I got to see Sylvia-san’s cute side.”
It had actually been right behind his head the whole time, so he hadn’t seen it.
Silvia rubbed her nose vigorously, then frowned and looked up at Arnie with a serious expression. “Well, then, let me say this again… I, Silvia MacLean, truly like you, Arnie. I’ve come to like you.” “Y-yes.” “…So, um…” “…………” “…………”
A stall. Arnie’s face flushed as he stared at the crimson-cheeked Silvia, who had lowered her gaze.
Then, in the corner of Arnie’s wide field of vision, he spotted a familiar bull-like face. “!?!”
Kelly. And Andy right beneath him.
Andy was squatting with his thumb pointed down in a silent boos gesture—totally immature.
Kelly clenched his fists and pumped them up and down in front of his face, signaling, “Go! Just go for it!”
“What are those guys even doing?” Arnie stared blankly, but after a moment, he understood the meaning behind Kelly’s “Go!” signal.
That’s right. Arnie had to move forward. This was that kind of moment.
“Um…”
Silvia snapped her head up at Arnie’s voice.
Arnie crouched down, locked eyes with her earnestly, and said, “I… I also really like you, Silvia… I do. …I want to be your boyfriend.”
“…Yes!”
Silvia leaned in smoothly, pressing her delicate lips against the ogre’s massive ones in a kiss.
The setting sun sliced across the mountain ridgeline, casting a gentle shadow over the lovers.
◇◇◇
“Sergeant Smyth.”
“Huh? Oh, it’s you, Boyd the lance corporal with the girlfriend.”
“U-um… I wanted to ask you about her.”
“Tch. What, do you want another custom accessory? My sense of style isn’t that great, so don’t think you can get away with that all the time.”
“Well, it’s kind of an accessory…”
“…Oh, is that so? Then fine, wait here a sec.”
Silvia usually worked at a corner deli in Basson City, frying up snacks.
That night, Arnie showed up unannounced—something rare for him.
“Sorry, the shop’s closed… Ah, Arnie!”
“Silvia. Uh… could you… take this?”
Suddenly, Silvia was presented with a small accessory.
It was Andy’s handmade necklace—a lacquered piece of Arnie’s own horn, with a hole drilled through it and a thin chain threaded through.
“Uh… this is…” “Yeah. I… I want my horns to be with the person I love.”
“Ugh, damn it! Listen up, you guys. Right now, I’m stuck in some dump like this, but back home, there’s a totally hot chick! Big boobs, a tight waist—she’s super in love with me! And she’s even a half-elf!” “Ah, here we go again. Another one of Smysom the Decan’s inner monologue about his imaginary girlfriend.” “Is that all you got? Hey, Ma’am, time to settle up.” “I said it’s not just in my head! It’s really Boyd’s girlfriend, okay?! Listen, idiot!”
The Crossbow Corps was once again a peaceful gathering of various races sharing drinks.